January 1
Dear Fitness Instructor,
Thank you so much for your encouragement! I am excited to begin this journey towards better health / fitness / pant size! Your boot camp / yoga / spin class sounds right up my alley and I can’t wait to turn myself into a Badass / yogini / Lance Armstrong look-alike. I mean, before he did all those performance-enhancing drugs.
Speaking of which, do you recommend supplements? I stocked up on protein powder / kombucha / Red Bull. How do you suggest I best fuel up for the workouts? I was thinking of a protein shake / energy bar / double espresso. Because I don’t want to bonk!
I love that you said you can individualize the class to all participants. So, I think it would be good for you to know a little about me: I’m not really into weights / push-ups / burpees. Lifting heavy things makes my back / knee / groin hurt. Also, I don’t like to sweat.
I am fully ready, though! I already bought a FitBit / personalized yoga mat / Air Forces. I have some awesome Athleta after-wear too. I’m breaking in the clothes running errands around town. I feel fitter already!
I have a lot of questions and I know you said just to show up and give it a try, but I think I’ll feel better if I get answers before the first day. Maybe we can meet for a chat / coffee / venti mocha latte?
See you then!
———–
January 26
Dear Fitness Instructor,
I haven’t yet been able to get to the trial class. I had an overload of work / errands / Cheetos. Also been suffering a bit from migraines / indigestion / lady problems. I really want to feel 100% ready to go when I walk in that door!
Thank you for sending that suggested meal plan. I should tell you that I don’t eat eggs / grains / fruit. I don’t care for spinach or kale. How’s romaine / iceberg / potato salad instead?
Also, plain water makes me gag. In lieu of that, I’ve substituted Diet Coke / margarita mix / Pinot Grigio.
I feel like once I lose weight / lose inches / get in shape, then I’ll be ready to hit the gym! I’m working on it!
See you then!
——-
March 18
Dear Fitness Instructor,
Thank you for your reminder that my free 90-day trial period ends this month. I’ve really wanted to get started but I didn’t want to battle the crowds / traffic / snowplows. You know how gyms are after the first of the year with all of those semi-committed New Years’ Resolution people! Me? I’m in for the long haul!
I’d like to take advantage of the final weeks but I have to take my son to basketball / swim team / Boy Scouts. My daughter needs me to drive her to dance / Starbucks / the mall. And our dog needs to be walked / groomed / get fixed. It’s so hard fitting in workouts!
Plus, it’s been so cold / windy / rainy. I know once we have warmer weather, I’ll be ready to run! I lost my FitBit though, do you recommend I buy another / Apple Watch / Rolex?
So, if you could please extend the free offer for the rest of the month / season / year, I’d be most grateful. Getting in shape is very important to me and I am fully invested!
See you then!
—
sometime in July
Dear Fitness Instructor,
I saw your ad for summer outdoor workouts. I’m sorry I haven’t been able to take advantage of your great classes yet. I’ve been busy with housework / kids / lounging by the pool.
And, our hamster / long-lost family friend / Aunt Sally died. So there’s that. Also, Prince died. Some few years ago. Some days I’m just too sad to exercise.
I’m not big on the heat / humidity / sun, so do you think it’s just better if I wait until fall?
See you then!
—
December 31
Dear Fitness Instructor,
I’m sorry to say that despite your promises, I don’t really feel like your training regimen worked for me this year. The difficulty was finding a convenient class time / route to the gym / way to get out of bed. And now I’d have to battle all of those New Year resolution-makers and I think it will be too crowded / loud / energetic for me.
Maybe we should consider some one-on-one training instead? Want to get together for a chat / coffee / venti mocha latte to discuss?
See you then!